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Wounds

About 2 weeks ago, I woke up and found out that one of my dogs happened to break off his leash and got away. I had to look all over for him and find for a temporary leash. While holding onto his broken leash, my dog suddenly tried to free himself, causing me to pull my arm and hit our screen door's lock causing my hand to have a wound. I didn't mind it at first, tied my dog with a new leash and went inside to wash my hands. Honestly, it stings so much! But I had to wash it off with soap, placed on a band aid and went on. However, my wound would still sting whenever it gets contact with anything, even water. I had a hard time shampooing my hair, or washing my hands, or touching things. After a few days, my wound became dry, however, it started itching, causing me to scratch it and peel off that brownish covering, and make it bleed again. I tried to resist scratching tho, but I just can't stand the itch. 

And then I remember reading this quote:

ccto

I remember seeing this post when I was heartbroken (over some guy) and I was trying so hard to move on from the break-up. Tho, I was still into him; I would go all over his Instagram account, create a fake Twitter account so I can follow him and see his tweets; I have always wanted to move on. Absurd, right? I was into believing that I will have him back, that he will be back, but all I see were different girls in his posts, that sometimes I get tired of it, but I'm still desperately hoping. It has been almost 3 years, and there's still a part of me that clings onto this person, and I don't know why, even when he has already shown me all the reasons not to. Until I had this wound on my hand again. 

These are the things I learned: 
1. Letting go can cause less harm
- I accidentally hit my hands on the screen door while trying to keep my dog from escaping. 
No matter how much we try to keep something/someone that wants to get away, we can't stop them. Let go, not because you don't love him/her, but because you love yourself. Let go, because holding on will only lead to more destruction, both on him and you. It's okay to love yourself more. 
2. It will hurt
- After washing my hands with soap, it continued to sting for days, mere having contact with water whenever I try to wash it out.
We will need to go through the pain. It's a process that we should undergo. We can't skip it, we can't be exempted. You try to erase all the memories, good and/or bad, but knowing that he/she left is barely enough to feel the pain. But you have to persevere, knowing that after all the pain it has caused you, your wound would heal. You just need time. 

3. It's gonna itch and might hurt again
- after about a week, a brownish covering started to form, a sign of it healing. However, it started to itch and I started scratching it, causing it to be removed and bleed again. 
There may come a time when you'll feel like you're all better, that you have moved on, but then, this person comes again and you realize that there are those lingering feelings left, causing you to think of the past, repeat your regrets and hurt yourself again. It can make you cry, sometimes, the pain goes back. And then you'll go back the the beginning. 

You see, moving on is not really easy, especially when you have given your all to someone. But we must always remember that moving on is a part of life. All we need to learn is to accept that things are not going to be the same again and to cope up with the changes life will lead us to. Some might think, 'It's easy for you to say' but honestly, it's not really easy at all. It's one hard task but it's a task we NEED to do. Not for other people but for ourselves. We need to learn to let go and love ourselves more than we love other people. It may take weeks, months or even years to finally move on but all things take time. Let's learn to forgive the people who hurt us and forget all the bad memories. Let's make new and better ones. Most of all, let's stop touching our wounds and get stuck in the pain. Let's not look back at the past mistakes and focus on making better decisions and apply the lessons these circumstances brought us. 

Cheers to the start of your new beginning, pal! God bless!

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