Living Life With No Regrets

Lately, I'v had so many realizations about life, about why things happened, and how things turned out this way and I think it is all for the better.  I remember how my mom always say, "God takes away the things that keep you from giving time to Him." and only now did I realize that.When it was so late. I can't blame God for doing so, because I know it was my fault. It really did took all my time from giving Him time that was supposed for Him and actually forgot about Him and focused on the thing that gave me "happiness" and "love." Suffering from the pain, I kept asking Him "Why?" Why does it always have to be me? Why am I the only one suffering, why am I the one always hurting? And all these were consequences of the things I did wrong. Oh, why don't I ever learn?!  Right now, I am trying my best to move forward as the new year approaches. Starting over will never be easily, but I know that I can do it for it is God who gives m

Happy New Year! Made a cover of Taylor Swift's Breathe. Last cover for the year! :)

It's been a month since I was heart broken, and I feel a lot more better now. But I will not be talking a lot about it in this post but everything will be about STRENGTH. Yes, strength that comes from the Lord. Lately, I've been reading my devotions again and it would always hit me, bull's eye. Everything was about "waiting" "timing" "failures" and everything related and it honestly opened up my yes to the things I always neglected, the things I always set aside. And in each day that passed, God has given me the strength, the hope and the courage to stand on my feet, lift my head high again and move on. I am so thankful for the strength I have right now, and that He never fails to show and reveal who He is, to me. After receiving news about "it" today, I felt a little pain. I thought I would be bursting out to tears. I felt chills, I felt sad, I felt my heart rip off, but it's surprising that I did not even shed a tear. Maybe

Almost been a week and I can say I'm not totally okay yet, but I think I'm a little better. Thanks to my friends who'd always try to do silly things to make laugh, my parents who would spoil me and let me do what I want to do these past few days and of course to God, who constantly reminds me of a lot of things through devotionals. Pain is still inside me but they're tolerable now and I think God actually did a miracle for making me feel less of the pain this fast. THANK YOU, LORD! I am really amazed how everything went so fine this time. I remember crying for months the last time I got my heart broken, but now, it has lessened as if everything happened years ago. I feel stronger and more mature now. Though there are still a lot of things I want to know, things I want to understand more and things I want to clear, I think there are things that are always better off unsaid. What's important is that you did everything you can to save the relationship, and the best p

Here I go again. Im sorry. I've been really depressed lately, that I do not know what to do anymore. For the first time after a long time, I felt how it is to love, be loved and to be hurt again and I never actually saw this coming. Just when I thought everything was going perfectly as it should be, everything eventually became so wrong that I do not know how to fix the mess that happened anymore. I felt so helpless, so hopeless. I felt like everything is coming right at me, without the plan of just letting me go, but hitting me from head to toe till I fall down on the ground. They say history repeats itself, and I think it's happening to me right now, for the second time around. When will I ever learn? Giving your love to someone is not easy because being in a commitment means giving your trust, your time, you effort, your love to your partner. It maybe so complicated, but it's part of it. There is nothing in this world that is not complicated. May it be your relation

Been too much depressed for almost 2 weeks now and I seriously don't know what to do anymore. I wanted to let go of all the feelings I have and just.. die. But I can't, of course. Cause I do not know how to kill myself and I know it's so illogical to do. So, I decided to just write and write and write until every little pain in me gets out. Because of depression, I seriously have no appetite for the past weeks and a lot of people are saying that I've become more thin (omg. what have i done to myself.) But I really don't feel like eating the right kinds of food and just want to eat sweets, sweets and sweets. Lately, I've been really out of mind. I tried to jump out of the window, go to the streets and cross even when the light is red, so much wanting to be in an accident, thinking that I'd rather feel physical pain than emotional pain. There was even a time when I was crossing the street going to school when a car almost hit me and.. I felt no fear of actua

Today, I was on my way, walking, to my bestfriend's house when I passed by this man with 2 kids. They have no home, and I was sure cause they were staying in a cart. It was raining so they were staying near the train station where there was enough shade for them. As I blogged the last time, I am currently in the stated of depression (or not anymore. Idrk), so basically, I don't care about anything else but myself and how I can actually move on and get all these sh*t together. I was carrying a big bag since I was from school, with food loaded in it. I saw them and passed by them. But then there was something that spoke to me to give one of the food inside my bag (my bag was filled with marshmallows since I was supposed to give it to my bestfriend's daughter). I actually hesitated but I can't help it, knowing that there was something pushing me to do it, so I stopped walking, opened my bag and got a pack of marshmallow, walked back and gave it to the eldest kid. I can s

I really have no idea if I should blog about what is happening to me right now. Well, basically, facebook and twitter friends know what is actually happening, but ofcourse, there is still  part of me that wants to share this to people around the world. (okay, i know im not a very famous blogger but, just give this to me) We all want a relationship that would last long. Longer than anyone thought of, longer than what we actually thought of and if FOREVER was true, then we'd want our relationship to reach forever. But why is it that when we thought FOREVER is coming to us, everything ends, everything goes wrong? Why does your hopes and dreams need to shatter with a blink of an eye? It's just too painful to see things end. Right now, I am indeed broken hearted (lol) but it doesn't mean I will be forever. There is pain in me right now that no one else can take away except for that person who broke it. I know, it's not impossible to bring him back, but we'll never kn

Is there really a difference? These three has always played a big part in my life. And I think in everybody's life. We all need time, we all need trust and we all hope that promises be made. But how can we have trust when time is not given and promises are broken? TIME. We all need time, we all need to give time. If we don't need time, then we don't have to know what time is it, we don't have to rush the things that must be done, we don't have to do what we actually have to do, because there is no limit for us to do the certain task. And yes, we all need to give time, give time to finish the works that should be done, to give time for almost everything we do, and most specially give time to the people that are important to us. Giving time is just like giving a portion of your life that you can never get back. Which means, you give time because that person is important to you. So why do we always say "you're important to me" when we don't give

Hey, guys! I really missed blogging but I have no time. T.T been studying real hard lately. 3-4 hours of sleep everyday, quizzes and laboratory works. Medtech is tiring, srsly. But, what can I do? I want to be a doctor someday so I really HAVE to finish this course, and will study more and more and more in the future. Examination week is over today, and stress free for today. YEY! Back to stress when papers are to be returned and.. *drum roll please* WILL I EVEN PASS MY MICROBIOLOGY SUBJECT??!!! I mean, it's so haaaarrrrdddd. Or maybe im still a little lazy in studying. So many things happened, I missed the time to write about all of them. Hopefully I'll have the time to blog weekly or at least every other week. Hope everyone's doing well! God bless everyone!

At dahil medyo mahirap magtranslate ng tagalog terms sa english, tatagalugin ko nalang tong post na 'to tutal Pilipino naman ako. Hahaha. Sa totoo lang, ang konti ng vocabulary ko kaya tatagalugin ko nalang para maiba naman. PAANO? Nakapanood na ako ng madaming mga pelikula, mga palabas sa TV, nakabasa ng mga articles, libro o storya, nakarinig ng mga hango sa tunay na buhay storya tungkol sa pagkakaroon ng "kabit" o ibang babae/lalaki ng mga may kasintahan o asawa at isa lang ang lagi kong naiisip: "PAANO NILA NAGAGAWANG TALIKURAN ANG MGA TAONG TAPAT NA NAGMAMAHAL SA KANILA?!" Isang napakasimpleng sabihin na tanong, pero marami ang maaaring maging sagot. Bilang isang babae, takot ako na mangyari sa akin ang ganitong bagay, lalo na't marami akong mga kaibigan na nakakaranas ng problemang ito, kung hindi man sa kanilang mga kasintahan, ang kanilang mga magulang. Paano nagagawa ng tao na "mangaliwa"? Hindi ba sila nakokonsensya na humanap ng

In my 18 years of existence, I won't deny I had 'boyfriends' and must admit it took me years to get over them. I mean, it's not that east to forget someone you spent special moments with, gave you happiness and gave you that "Kilig" factor. And honestly, I am not good at that. I'm no good in forgetting people. I treasure people A LOT. YES. I had this guy whom I loved back in highschool. He wasn't the prefect type of guy, but I really do love him. He was like my "first love". How hard would it be to forget the first guy you loved, (aside from your dad and/or your brother of course) they guy you fell real hard for, the guy who gave you so much importance, the guy whom you made future plans with. You can't easily forget someone you shared a lot of things with, though some people can manage to easily forget about the past, still im having a hard time doing it. Since I was young, I swore to myself that I will only love 1 guy and he would b

I really really want to share this with you guys, so I made this "Throwback" post. It's for the reason that it was a big big event of my life and I just can't not share it. lol okay, so I am posting about my Debut Party! *clap clap* It was held on January 3, 2014, and it was really fun, exciting, dramatic and, whatever. But I really enjoyed it! Though many were not able to come because the venue was too far away from their place (the party was held in our province, that's why), it was still successful!  It was just a small party though, so you don't need to expect anything big about it lol My first dance, My Dearest Dad. Okay, so this made me cry, really lol idk  "I never get to say this to her, but I am so proud of her" - Dad "You're a lady now but for mommy, you're still my baby" - Mom The words that made me cry a river. Never expected for those words to come from my parents. I mean, no matter how many

Okay, so I am having a dilemma right now because of the turtle-like internet connection here at home and seriously, I am so bored of doing the same things everyday, especially that it's summer and WE HAVE NO PLANS OF GOING OUT OF TOWN . srsly. I am planning to watch lots and lots of korean dramas, but due to our internet connection, which would make me watch a 2 minute video in 10 minutes, I am planning on buying CDs of it than downloading one episode for the whole day. So, one drama that's on my list is "My Love from the Stars" or "My Love from the Stars." A little bit delayed, though I knew it aired months ago, just after The Heirs ended, but I really had no time to watch since I was too busy in school. So tell me, is it great? Though it's the only drama that's on my mind right now since I am watching My Girlfriend is a Gumiho, AGAIN. And by the way, can you also suggest more new dramas or even old ones (which you think I haven't watched) for

I had a conversation with our Youth Pastor, Kuya Eric, and some other youth in our church just after our youth activity ended. The funny thing is, the conversation was about what matters most in relationships. I do have someone special right now and he lives in our province while I study in the city. We basically see each other only on saturdays and sundays and we feel having a kinda long distance relationship. That is why this topic was brought up. Today, I invited my guy bestfriend to come over and join in our fellowship which gave a little awkward feeling for my friends in church since "he" was there too. Pastor Eric, (wait. I not used to call him that lol) actually have a girlfriend who is currently in a place far fro our church. She lives somewhere in the northern part and we're somewhat down here. lol so they meet each other for a week every month, making us ask if it isn't hard for them, and he admitted that it is. And so the topic was change from their love

I have always loved everyone around me. I treat everyone as my friend, some the closest, some, the best. But then there is always something that makes me sad having so much people too close with me: THEY LEAVE ME. I remember having a friend whom I always thought to be someone close to me. I remember often going to her house, to teach her play the guitar, or sometimes go to some church activities, we practiced singing and dancing together, even her parents know me. I became close to her that I treat like my own sister. But as we grew up, she began to go away from me. Further and further, till I can't reach her anymore, and seems like she has changed into another person. Until there came a time I became bitter of her and, I must admit, I said things that were not good about her. I hate people who leaves. I am a Korean/Japanese/Taiwanese Drama lover, and I have watched a lot of dramas with so many goodbyes, and I should say that I become too emotional about it, it seems like, I can&

We all want to be understood by the people we expect to understand us most. Our parents, our friends, those people who are really close to us, we all want them to understand the things we do, we say and we want. But what if these people are the ones who do not understand us? My mom had always knew what I am able to do, where I am best at and what I wanted to do. Yes, she knows everything I want.  And my mom knows that I want to be an artist, or something that's related to media: maybe a Film Director, and Actress, a singer, composer, whatever, but i at least want to be someone involved in the field of arts. I know my mom knows I do well whenever I'm involved in these things, it is well known to everyone around me, and yes, some people would say that I would succeed in these fields., yet my mom had always just smiled whenever people says things like that and tell them I would be a doctor. I know it was a mistake taking MedTech in the first place, if I really have no plans o

Hi, guys. Been half a year since I haven't updated my blog. Got real busy schedule in my 2nd sem class, so, now that it's vacation, I think I can update more often, though I might have summer class because of a subject I left behind a year ago. Anyway, I do hope to use this blog often this time! :) So many things have happened and I am really not sure where to begin. I know I'v missed a lot of things for the past half year, but I surely will do my best to blog all of them and share everything that happened in my life, to you :) Hope it's not too late to share happiness and love with you guys!